All good things must come to an end

Got your hopes up, right? No, still working with the refugee clinic and still have our nanny.

I was referring to my complaining. I hereby promise to do my best to no longer complain.

The clinic is getting organized and I am actually happy that I can still function in an environment that doesn't involve wearing snot or drool on one or both of my shoulders (tho I wish I had looked in the mirror afer our good bye hugs to have seen the snot on the shoulder as I left). I am actually pleased with the progress I(we)'ve made and am optimistic that this will be the best refugee clinic in the greater SD area. ( I think the competition is pretty slim- so the odds are in our favor)

The kids seem to be doing fine and seem to be reaping the mommy-left-them-for-the-day-guilt rewards- we spent yesterday together- no daytime business stuff- just the 3 olders and me in line at the pass and id office, at the smog check center and then we went to open swim at the pool(all of us) for the afternoon. So.. yes, they had to be away from me for 3 days and now I'm all the more aware of making every moment "count" while I am home. (yeah, I know- it's quality AND quantity- I'm working with what I've got) And I know waiting in line is not my idea of fun, but they think they're missing out on something good if they're not there. It's funny we humans seem to think there is something better out there that we are misisng out on and once we get there, it's not what we thought it was going to be.

The Earth Moved

And I didn't notice

So.. there was a magnitude 5.4 earthquake here. Closer to Larry at Pendleton than where I was at the refugee clinic. And the house was somewhere in between.

We're all fine (in case you were wondering) and to be honest, I was probably too far away to notice or think it was anything more that a big truck rumbling by. And I'm pretty desensitized to the earth moving after having the Marines blow stuff up in our backyard for over a month now. (the land mines they blow up DO simulate earthquakes pretty good- minor earthquakes) Unsettling at first, but now it's comforting to have the rhythmic thuds to lull me to sleep.

And it was day 2 at the job. I got hung up in traffic (a fire) and was 20 minutes late. And still beat NPIC there to the clinic. There were 2 other ladies there to work who are genuinely cool people- who believe in working with this population for various reasons and both Christians who feel God wants them there. (thank you all for praying for that confirmation)

So.. with no NPIC there (not like it would have made a difference, anyway) I could organize as I saw fit as could the other 2 and things are looking up. (and I have deep suspicion that NPIC will not be with the clinic all that much longer)

Still really really busy. And chaotic, but less so. The demand for translators is pretty intense. And one of the ladies there speaks 3 languages AND english. HOW does one even DO that? I'm struggling with learning 1 other language. She's amazing in more ways than that, but I am in awe.

So.. It was a full long day. I am beat.

And on to other stuff- I have a business address now, so that is taken care of, I just have to finish the paper work and go and take care of the rest of that.. and register the cars on base since it's been more than 7 days on our 7 day temporary passes. (Fun fun fun.) And the kids want to go wait in line so we can be together. I see celebratory ice cream cones for that wait in our future. (mexican ice cream is really good and they have super cool flavors like coconut, watermelon-chili, guava, cucumber, bubblegum, and a bunch of stuff I don't know what it is.. )

And if you notice "a"'s missing- the laptop took a bad tumble and the "a" button now has bad arthritis and no longer likes working the first time I push it- gonna go see if I can find the warranty information on it. (who in their right mind will warranty a lap top with 4 kids and a clumsy mom who has a tendency to spill coffee and almost always is drinking coffee on it in the am?)

First day

OK it didn't win "worst day of my life" or even tie for second.

But let me take a moment to be serious and ask for some prayer for wisdom and discrenment on this job.

And let me say- if you're looking for effecient health care- look else where than that clinic.

I was supposed to arrive at 10. The clinic is only open 10-2, so it shouldn't be a big deal to work 2 days a week, ya know?
*I* got there at 10 and so did the 20 Iraqi refugees who were supposed to be seen today for their full indepth health screening which all refugees need when they reach this country dispite having a ton of health exams prior to entering the US...

So.. there is the waiting hall way which a guy from the refugee assistance side opened the door so that everyone could get off the sidewalk- about 10 x5 feet. 5 chairs and some pamphlets on some health related topic.. NO NPIC. I cll NPIC and leave a msg on his cell saying "uh, how do I get in?" 30 minutes later, the CEO of the clinic that oversees it all catches wind of the near riot in the waiting room and unlocks the door. I explain that I'm supposed to start working today and he lets me in and I start trying to make sense of the day about to happen.

The problem with names we're unfamiliar with is, if there is a chart- good luck in figuring out if the name is last name first name or vise versa or if it is even the right name.

So.. of those 20 Iraqi people, it took 5 hours to see as many as could be seen, but I think 5 were re-scheduled. There was also an a few people from African countries seen, tho I don't remember the names of them. And then those from Burma...

They spoke Arabic, Farsi, Pidgeon English (seriously!), Bermese, and oh, sheesh, I forget.
I was amazed at the interpreters some being in this country for under a year and speaking english as well as they did. And the interperters were amazingly patient people.

And from what I could tell- the case workers seemed to genuinely care as well..

But.. no opportunity to prostelitize and I'm not entirely sure how that is to come about.

So.. back to the serious note- if you can pray from some discernment if I should persist in this. The kids were really acting up tonight when I got home and the girls told me they missed me. The baby bit me and the nanny earlier today(!!) and Joey and Kayla were duking it out like WWF most of the day.

We need the income because we're short on the budget and I'm short on time. But somehow I seem to be even shorter on time now that I was before. There won't be a change in that until we can move somewhere where our fixed expenses aren't soo high. (smaller/cheaper house

And the song of the week is

Random kid things

So.. I sit here with the first 10 minutes of quiet in a long time. JM's a green booger making machine today, so DH had Sunday off (first in 3 weeks) so he took the olders to church, JM just went for a nap and I sit here with my ears ringing from the silence

So.. here are some of the things I hear in the back of my head now that I can hear it over the deafening noise that usually surrounds me.

spoken by the kids:

"Mom, do the eyes in the back of your head get wet when you wash your hair?" (I've told them that all moms get eyes on the back of their heads, so they have to behave even if my head isn't facing them, lol)

Similar to the "mommy look at me!!" honey, I have to watch the road right now, I can't turn around "then use the eyes on the back of your head"

"When we were babies in your stomach, Sonia and I came out first and left Kayla and JohnMichael playing in there"

"BALL!" pointing to rabbit poop (this is one of JM's 2 word vocabulary)

(THUD!!) "Ouch!!! Don't worry mommmy, I'm ok!!" when one of them tried to jump on the bed... the bottom bunk bed (duh)

To me immediately repeated by
(THUD!!) "OWWWHHHHHHH MOMMMMMY I hurt my head" (another kid, same action)

I'll remember more later, I think I hear them home already.

I start Monday

Unless I quit already.

One of the MA's on day 2 decided it was not for her.. so she quit.

And the NP In Charge (furthermore to be referred to as NPIC, lol) was at a loss of what to do, so without my license, he wants me to start monday to "get acquanted" with the building and the clinic and fill in where needed (the MA job)

I am having heart palipations and a minor anxiety attack. I haven't WORKED worked in a long time and I haven't had a NEW job to learn since 1997. (oh, can I really be THAT old?!)

SO.. new job, frighteningly chaotic/disorganized job, and a commute..

ACK!!

The job

ah.... I am getting some cold feet.

I like the idea of working with refugees, particularly Muslim ones that I have the opportunity to "proselytize" without risk of getting killed in a foreign land. LOVE that idea. And the patients/clients served are from all parts of the world. While I was there, there as a guy from Uganda and a family with sick baby who'd arrived about 3 weeks ago from Thailand (I think?)

HOWEVER..the commute.. oh how I love Southern CA. At 10 am- not rush hour- 10AM the traffic was 25 MPH on the 4-6 lane free way for MILES. no apparent reason- no accident, just massive slow downs.

And even without that, Mapquest tells me it will take about an hour to get there.

AND holy crap the place is in chaos with the NP in charge saying 'don't worry' about everything and the 2 poor MA's who are on their 2nd (yes, 2nd) day and totally on their own without any sort of guidance from him as to what they are actually supposed to be doing..

Really.. I am quite familiar with chaos- it's my daily life- but THIS was Chaos on growth hormone and probably a little amphetamines thrown in.

So.. with that... I have "passed" first round of interviews and interview with the medical director (MD) Monday evening and as soon as I have my license I can start (oh, and I got to go re-certify CPR, too.. and probably ACLS, tho I really can't see myself using it there) and it looks from the paperwork that I need to do a pre-employment PE.

I'm looking into taking the commuter train there, too. In addition to the lovely commute, the clinic itself is in a neighborhood that I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving a GPS in (if you know what I mean) and apparently a computer from the clinic grew legs this week. Oh, and there's virtually no parking, so I'd have to park on the street somewhere..

So.. It's under "re-organization" so I'm probably just seeing the worse side.

In case you're wondering- here is it's website:
http://www.alliancehealthclinic.org/

And the larger organization the clinic is under:
http://www.alliance-for-africa.org/

A New Job

Well THAT was fast.

I have been offered a job, interview tomorrow to confirm (backwards, huh?) that we're right for each other.

Working with African Refugee Women, providing health care, particularly to pregnant women and working as a liaison to SDSU to raise awareness, I think?? It sounded interesting, anyway.

It's a NP run clinic- sorta exciting- NP run clinics can be fabulous or miserable, depending on the NPs. And the other 2 sound like people I'd get along with (east-coasters, lol)

What ISN'T fast is how long it's actually going to take to get my licenses to work. So... I think I FINALLY figured out all the paper work. I think. And because it's the lovely state of California, I had to be fingerprinted and have a FBI criminal background check. For which I had the opportunity to pay ALOT of money. I'm starting to think organized crime is alive and well in the licensing boards- seriously- you have to pay everyone off just for the opportunity to make money of which the state and federal government will take a part and then the board certifying board gets it's chunk and you have to pay the state off every year to continue to work.

And you get to apply for the temporary license which you may get in 2-6 weeks if expedited or up to 4 months for your permanent licence. 4 months? you have GOT to be kidding me.

And on to other licenses...

Business licenses.

UGH

So.. Today as the day for me to go to the town hall and get a business license. Until I read the fine print. We will not be getting a home business license. I'm in a mad scramble to find a physical location for the business.

Por Que?

Glad you asked. The lovely city we live in has some rules about how much of the house and specifically which parts of the house you can use.

You cannot use your garage for business use- you have to use it to park your cars. And not just 1 car, but 2. We can't fit 2 cars in our garage without the business stuff. Are they going to tell me I can't live here, either? (I am not making this up- google oceanside business license rules)

OK.. So.. EVEN IF IF IF we move everything out to storage somewhere, there was some other insane rules I can't even remember.. Oh, yes. After you pay to apply for your license, you have to pay and schedule your inspection with the fire department where they check to see that you can park your 2 cars in the garage and use no more than 200 square feet of your house for business reasons. And you get to pay them, too.

But on to the photos-

If you've never visited smog, here it is:

Adventures in International Trade

So.. the bill for those diapers I authorized at 5 am came due... (and it ended up being less than 3000kg that I added- phew)

And we have to wire the money to the bank in Pakistan via a bank in New York. We'd done it 6 times or so before to the same company from VA, and the first time it was a 2 hour long process. I call the VA bank and ask to wire the money and there is no way no how they will do it without us being there.

UGH. Plan B. Use our local bank and go through the 2 hour long process again of them trying to figure out which code goes where..

I almost fell out of my seat when the bank girl said "oh, I don't think you're allowed to send money there"

huh?

I know this is a military associated bank and that we're at war in that general area of the world.. but.. I'm pretty sure there wasn't a law passed.

"No", she says, "it's not allowed."

Blank stare from me. Uh.. because this is Navy Federal and you seem to not offer normal bank services (like notarizing stuff- see older post) or why?

"Because it's pakistan"

Still scratching my head.. huh??? WHY??

Long and short, I sat there dumbfounded until she called the manager who said if another bank did it, then they could. I assume if it was, say, Iran, it might be a problem, but com'mon- Pakistan? They're supposed to be sympathetic to Americans there (as sympathetic as a Muslim country can be, I guess)

Still no confirmation that it went sucessfully, but it's just another day in la vida loca here.

La Cosina Limpia

Por mi amiga Tamara en Oklahoma:

And our nanny/housekeeper

Really. She speaks spanish!!

my new homepage

http://translation2.paralink.com/

It is super cool. I type in what I was trying to say, and it translates it for me.

OK.. back to work. La Basura is calling me.

Day 1

Habla Espanol?

OK. me neither unless you count my 2 years of it in highschool that was about 15 years ago.

But let me tell ya, for the first time EVER since we've been here and I think since we've been married- my kitchen doesn't have an ounce of clutter. (or, it didn't until Larry came home... see the theme there?)

Today went like this- she'd put stuff in a pile and tell me to put it away or put it in la Basura.

So.. with THAT motivation, the kitchen has gotten clean and the rest of the house is on it's way. Halleluja!

But somehow it wasn't the least bit of the relaxing with my kids and getting caught up on other stuff that I was envisioning.

But.. boy oh boy it is nice to have a clean kitchen!!

ah HA! All you gotta to is TELL them..

The grocery baggers, I mean.
Remember I was frustrated by them last week?

So, I went this weekend and.. would you believe? If you tell them "I don't want the milk in a bag" they'll actually not put it in a bag.

What a revelation!

Wonder what else I've been grumbling about that I just need to open my mouth about....

Well... I did it.

I just applied for that job.

I must be old or something, but the whole apply online, upload your resume/cover letter way was very very new to me. And it took a hour longer than if probably would have because I kept hitting the backspace button which made it go back a page and logged me out, so I had to start over again. (it's probably part of the test- how many times do you mess it up before getting it right?)

We will see what happens.

Finally

An uneventful day

We went to our final day of swim lessons, stayed 2 hours of open swim time at the pool, came home and worked on catching up on the stuff.

And I found a job I think would be perfect-
Per Diem
SDSU student health

That's pretty much my favorite patient population. It's familiar, it's a population that is terribly lost and looking for happiness in all the wrong places and an age I used to have such a heavy hearted burden for. And I'll get to do 20 pelvic exams a day again, lol.

With everything else that has happened here lately, I still need to get a passport photo and submit my final application for my nursing licenses here, but I think I'll apply with it pending.

And the nanny starts Sunday night.

Yes. We actually have arranged to hire her- the older lady who only speaks spanish. We went 2 weeks ago, met her, her current family (who love her but the parents are having marital difficulty and for several reasons, they are sending the kids to full time preschool) and Larry got to interview her. I'm not fluent enough to understand more than every 4th word or so, so it will be interesting to say the least.

I am pretty relieved to have help comming. I have been drowning in business related stuff with no prospect of catching up and Larry hasn't been around to help (obviously, if you read the other posts- he did show up late last night and got an earful about what he had missed. I now have his beeper number and programmed the hospital phone numbers into my phone)

And it will be wonderful to be able to go on job interviews without having to find babysitters.

And when I get my thyums removed, it will be really nice to have live in help here. I know my mom has said she'd come, but I'm sure she'd be able to come for a week or two and have to leave. To have help longer will be wonderful. For that alone, I think it will be well worth it.

So... What happened?

The long version? Or the epic one?


Essentially it started that we had to travel down to Chula Vista (over an hour away) to retrieve our trailer from the person who was borrowing it, who was supposed to have brought it back, but couldn't and called the day before and said, it needed to be picked up Wednesday. SOoooo...


I go there to get it, left no less than 3 messages on his voice mail- we'll be there in 3 hours, we're on our way and "we're here to get the trailer, WTH are you and when are you going to answer your phone??!!!"


So.. I wasn't really about to drive an hour and a half back home for him to call and say, 'oh, now's a good time' so we were hanging out in the driveway with me calling his phone every 2 mintues until he had his assistant answer it. (I knew he was just ignoring it and I figured if I called it enough the annoyance factor would get him to pick it up, which makes me even madder about this whole situation)


SO... I explain to his assistant the situation, she puts him on the phone and he tells me the hitch is in his garage (it wasn't. I was in his garage, his landlord was there and let us in and use the restroom because the kids had to go...) So, no hitch to be found. At that point, he decides it must be at the new house, so he'll leave in 15 minutes to go there, get it and tells me he'll be there in 20 minutes. (his clock runs on a different time. It was an hour by my watch) calls me from the new house says, no it's not there either, he'll go get a new one and be there in 15-20 minutes..


Now... all this time the kids had NOTHING to do. so.. they're stir crazy, bickering, hungry and thirsty. (because I didn't think I needed to pack dinner or more than the snack they had eaten on the way down there)


SO.. that sets the stage for when after all is said and done and the new hitch arrives, the trailer is on the truck and we're ready to leave and I say

"everyone in their seats and buckle"


And the bickering over the front seat ensures. (the second row of the SUV where the window rolls down)


So..


I tell Sonia to climb into the back, it's Joey's turn.


Rather than go over the seat that's folded down for just such a reason, she decided to try to climb/jump over the seat.


However- rather than make it over the seat, she hit something and fell backwards out of the truck and hit the back of her head on the pavement.


No blood, lots of crying, but it was time to go home, we'd get tylenol, ice and food when we got home.

not 10 minutes down the road, Sonia, the girl who does not ever sit still nor sleep was falling asleep in the back of the car. THIS made me nervous- pull over, so a mini mental exam- eyes PELLRA, equal grip strength, orientated... move her to the front seat, Joey to the back..


Back on the road in rush hour San Diego traffic, praying to get home asap, calling Larry on his cell phone who did not answer. (he still has not answered or apparently checked his messages since he has not called home yet- he's on call in San Diego his month.)


At this point, she vomits and then falls asleep. I pull over again "SONIA! wake Up!!!" she looks at me briefly and her eyes roll in the back of her head


I'm ready to vomit- pull off the highway looking for the hospital. Call 411 for the hospital phone number, they connect me and I swear a pay phone in the janitor closet was ringing, not the main line because it rang 30 times without anyone answering.


I am lost downtown, see no blue H hospital sign, no map in the car and Sonia barely responding to me.


Oh, and draging the trailer.


Can't find a hospital, much less the Navy one that Larry's is at.


Call my parents for advice from my dad on the head injury and for my mom to look up the navy hospital phone number - no one there


So I call 911 for directions to the hospital


"ma'am, what is your emergengy?"


(summarize the head injury, falling asleep, vomiting)


"Where are you?"


uh, on 4th at the junciton of market


"what direction are you going?"


it's a one way road- the only way it's letting me


"ma'am you need to pull over so the paramedics can find you"


I don't want paramedics, I can't pull over, I'm in rush hour traffic, pulling a trailer, there is only parrallel parking here, no open spaces and I can't back up with this thing, much less parallel park it!!! Just twll me where the hospital is!!!


"Ma'am you need to calm down and pull over for the paramedics to get to you"


WHY can't you just tell me where the hospital is???!!!


Fast forward- I pull into a bus stop space and the firetruck and ambulance are there shortly


Tell them no less than 10 times what happened.

Sonia was suddenly more awake with 10 men in funny outfits hovering over her, putting a neck collar on her and strapping her to a trama board.


I can't leave the truck with other kids and trailer, so I have to drive it to the hospital. I ask them to take her to the Navy hospital, so I have a chance of reaching Larry who didn't answer any of the 800 calls/messages


No, they say it's a trauma, they have to take her to a children's hospital. (apparently there are 2 here)


I couldn't find A hospital, and you think I can find a children's one? OK, fine, I'll follow you


"well, ma'am, we have to go with lights and sirens, it's protocol for trauma in a kid"


How am I supposed to get there?


"don't you know where Children's is?"

NO, we just moved here. I couldnt' find ANY hospital, that's why you're here.


"Do you know where Escondito is?"

no

"the 163?"

no I do not know anywhere here!!!!!!


So.. firefighter guy writes down directions which would have been fabulous.. IF I knew how to get to the first highway he had on them


The ambulance leaves and Joey is flipping out that they are taking Sonia away.

So.. we follow the best we can- but they're going through every red light and there is one at every block, so in a matter of seconds there were 5 red lights between us.


BUT I could see it long enough to follow it to the highway which was the first in mr firefighter's directions.


Of course, I don't know how fast they were going on that highway, but I was going over 80 and never caught up to them.


I get off the highway and follow the hospital sign and then the emergency sign.

And it's a city hospital- there is only parking garage parking.

Ever tried to manuver a King size SUV with trailer in a parking garage?

I'm not that good a driver- find a surface lot with a "for patients of this building only, all others will be towed sign, take up 1/2 the parking lot and run - put JM in the stroller, dragging Kayla and Joey to the Big red ER sign, get in there and they don't have Sonia.


Oh my GOD please help me!! Where is my child?!


Ah, you see, that was the adult ER for the adult hospital- 2 blocks down was the entrance to the Childrens' hospital. The 3 minutes for the ER clerk took to relay this info felt like an eternity.


RUN/carry Kayla/drag Joey/Push stroller to the Children's er.. get there and yes, they have her.


Bring us alll back to the bay they are holding her in..

They explain that she's been acting fine since she arrived, no more vomiting, and a little sleepy but no further eyes in the back of the head stuff and she responded fine to the others there..


Feed her (and her siblings) a popcicle, it stays down. The DR says that a CT scan would be too much radiation for a 5 year old, so they'd rather not.. (and at this point she's looking much better and I'm ready to go home now.. )


They keep her another hour for observation and let us go. It is now their bedtime, they haven't had dinner other than that popcicle and they are tired, hungry and don't want to walk to the truck which I have no guarantee of it actually being there.


And I have no idea of where we are and do not see any magical McD's anywhere.


Sonia's shoes were in the truck, so she went in the stroller, JM behind her in the way I used to cram 2 kids in the single stroller before and Kayla I half carried half dragged while she and Joey whined with every step that they were hungry and didn't want to walk..


The truck was there and the stroller bent with that much weight in it.


Well, we came on a highway, right? but I didn't see the entrance to that highway there. Follow the highway signs and eventually get on it thinking I was going the right direction...


Sigh..


sorta the right direction.


Eventually find a Taco Bell for dinner at 9:30 PM.

Remember what a spectacular driver I am? try a narrow drive through with trailer.

At least the trailer already had some yellow paint on it from previous scrapes.


Get home, tuck Sonia into my bed, the others into their beds. Check on her every hour. The adrenealine rush kept me away pretty much most of the night anyway.


And Larry still hasn't checked in.

And the winner is..........

TODAY

In the "worst day of my life thus far" contest

I'll actually post the details once I have a chance to process it. We just got home, I have 367 things I need to get done before I sleep and earlier today I watched my daughters life flash before my eyes, then watch her get loaded into an ambulance I couldn't keep up with (in hindsight I should have run the 5 red lights it would have taken to catch up to it and run over the poeple who cut me off that caused there to be that many stop lights between us), then couldn't find the right hospital she was brought to.....

it is good to have her home, to be home. whatever home may smell like.

(Camera was back in my purse because we had swimming lessons today and I was planning on taking pictures of Sonia actually SWIMMING!! (halleluia) so, I have pictures for the imaginary scrapbook after things calmed down enough for me to think halfway straight. )

Children's hospital ER- they're watching a movie there and waiting the required time before she could be released
No, not the actual ambulance. This was at the exit we left and I figured for the imaginary scrapbook, we'd have a picture of Sonia's first (and Lord willing) only ambulance ride.

And the swimming pictures: (uh, well, I didn't actually catch the swimming on film. I'll try again next time)

PSD

No, Not Post-Stress-Disorder

It's the department here on base where you go to get your new ID and get everything paperwork with pay/insurance/etc taken care of. I needed my ID updated to enroll the kids in the free/fun activies so.. it was becoming a necessity to darken those doors.

It's also the place where graduates of the Motor Vehicle Department School of Customer Service go when the graduate.

We spent 1 1/2 hrs there today. there were 3 people in front of us. I swear the guy there just sat in a trance staring at his computer screen for 20 minutes before moving to help anyone on the sign in sheet and then he tranced out again after helping the 2 people before us.

I'm thinking work slowdown? Or Quotas?

And.. I have pictures of the occasion!

WHY do I have pictures? because I wasn't planning on spending 1 1/2 hrs waiting to get through a line 3 people deep and came prepared with only the contents of my purse which contained:
1 matchbox car
1 1/2 granola bars
3 sticks of gum
1 package of fruit snacks
random receipts
no pencils or pens for the kids to write on themselves or the random receipts
1 set of keys just out of panic button range (tell me you've never let you kids hold the keys in your house and they push the bright red one and wake up the entire neighborhood)
a cell phone
and a camera

SO... when gum was chewed, granola bars turned into confetti on the chairs and floor and fruit snacks inhaled we turned to the camera for entertainment.

By a miracle that is worthy of old testament days, the batteries lasted the entire time and I took probably 100 pictures of the kids making faces and then them wanting to see them.

And I'd share them, but, frankly I'm too tired to get up off my butt to find the camera which never made it back into my purse, but rather into my pocket but that was 2 pairs of pants ago since it was bath night.. so.. I'd have to turn on the light, wake my dear sleeping husband and possibly the sleeping toddler, so.. you'll have to wait. And I'm really probably the only person who'd find them funny, anyway.

Why you should never go to the grocery store hungry

That is a package of sliced cheese that my toddler helped unpack. (in defense of packaged cheese- it is 100% cheese- NOT processed cheese slices. The line at the deli was a week long and this cheese was on sale and thus 1/2 price of wait-for-a-week deli counter. )

He had also had 2 granola bars and a sippy cup of milk while we were in the store. I doubt he was THAT hungry.

*I* on the other hand, WAS hungry, so our total bill was $40 over what I intended to purchase and somehow a bag of Dorritos magically appeared in my cart. And then half of it magically diappeared in the 10 minutes between unloading the cart and unloading the truck at the house. (well, we ALL had some and when you have 5 of us munching on it, it disappears pretty quickly)

And ya know what is really frustrating?

Grocery baggers and cloth grocery bags.

I'm one of those who took the plunge and has a bunch of reusable cloth bags. I prefer the actual CLOTH ones- canvas opposed to the cheap and cheaply made in china versions commonly found in the grocery stores themselves. My ONE of those cheap bags has holes where the seams were and is falling apart after 2 months of use.

If I could, I would fire the baggers. They aways put my milk in the canvas bags and then the groceries in plastic bags. It makes me nutty. I have them for GROCERIES my milk don't need a bag- it's in a nice container with a handle already..but every time..

Today-- oh, today they put 4 gallons of milk in one canvas bag and in another they put 1 gallon of milk and every canned item they could find. I could barely lift them. However- the shaving cream- got it's own bag. The insulated bag got... the eggs and bread (huh??) and the others cloth bags were filled with about as much as you'd put into one of those flimsy plastic bags and then left empty. and my actual frozen stuff went into those flimsy plastic bags.

I know you don't need an advanced degree in engineering to bag groceries, but can you at least use a little common sense?

And the commisary is one of those places I just don't understand the system- they have unpaid baggers- they work for tips- and they'll carry/push your groceries out for you and load them in your car.. Which is very nice when I'm feeling weak and tired or trying to deal with extra cranky kids... BUT you don't have the option of bagging your own stuff. I whistfully remember the days in CT where you'd have to be disabled or sit there for a week and a day for someone to bag your groceries and then they'd make sure the eggs and milk were at the absolute bottom of the bag and cart- (it may have had something to do with my grocery shopping after 9 pm, but...) HERE- you have 2 of them bagging your stuff before you blink. And I have to make sure I have at least enough cash on me to tip them.

I thought I could outsmart them. I load my milk dead last onto the conveyor and the bags go on first. And in between is more than enough groceries to fill those bags - especially now that I'm trying to go less often than 1x a week. And yet they save the cloth "heavy weight bags" for the heavy stuff. I guess in 3rd grade logic it makes sense.. however in my "I-have-to-carry-this-stuff-in-the-house-and-would-like-to-make-as-few-trips-as-possible-logic" it makes no sense at all.

That gives me an idea.. I wonder how much tip I'd have to give them for them to come and carry the stuff into the house for me... hmmmm.... I'll let you know how that works out.

Overheard

(Well, it was more shouted, so it'd be hard not to overhear)

SONIA!!!! Don't pull that shower, it makes you head pop off!!!!!

(look close, the head IS off the shoulders, lol)

And he's still climbing...

And the magical stuff that in fact does not make stains disappear instantly. We're on bottle 2 of the stuff, and it doesn't appear to have done a thing.

Sometimes you just don't want to know

And if that is the case do NOT. I repeat do NOT buy a black light to look for stains in the house you're renting.

The house smelled sorta like a frat house meets litter box meets wet dog when we moved in. The entire upstairs was carpeted, and although shampooed 2x before we moved in, SMELLED BAD. BAD BAD BAD kind of bad.

And I've used no less than 8 bottles of "Kids and Pets" (the inventor should be nominated for a nobel prize, IMO) on the obvious spots where the previous resident cats had sprayed the baseboard and cleaning the carpets by hand in the places that made me want to vomit the most, but it still smelled.
Got them professionall cleaned and treated and while smell LESS.. still smells (and I'm not overly sensitive).

So.. Larry on one of his trips to home depot or lowes for something or other found this box with urine smell remover potion and black light to find the spots.

HOLY CRAP!!

The place looks like a crime scene with that light. There is no area of the base boards untouched by urine (presumably cat) and there are HUGE areas where you sit there and think "how many dead bodies could have covered this area" And this was after the professional treatment.

Now the OCD in me used the entire bottle of magic potion and, well, it didn't go away before my very eyes as the bottle promised. I'll see what things look like tomorrow night. And the night after and the night after that and the night after that.. and keep spraying stuff on it until it a. goes away or b. molds or c. my credit card freaks out because there is no way someone can go and buy the same thing that many times at the same store and there must be an error.

But on a happier note- the house closing was today. And just incase there are other real estate agents who want to call the west coast from the east... (and as if they'd be reading this blog..)

There is a 3 hour time difference. What is 12 noon est is 9 am pacific. You're eating lunch while I'm cleaning up breakfast. ok? If you recently finished breakfast, there is a chance that I am asleep. Especially if Larry's on call and not home for me to set my alarm and make sure he gets up..

So, while you may be calling me before 9 am local time to discuss how to use the pool and pool pump, it is before 6 in CA and the pool and pool pump in VA is probably one of the last things I want to stumble around trying to find the phone for, wondering who had died that the phone is ringing repeatedly at this early hour...

There were several 6 am or earlier calls this week from several people (not just the real estate lady). I wonder how much worse it would be if we were sent to say, Hawaii?? Guam?? Okinawa? hmmm... things to ponder the next time I can't find my glasses or the telephone in the dark.

On one of those phone calls, I authorized the purchase of 3000kg of diapers. (of course, what else do we buy in such large quantities, right?) I think. I'm not even sure what I did. It might have been more. And for those metric challenged- that would be 6750 lbs.

I need to not answer the phone before drinking at least 2 cups of coffee. So, if it is an emergency, please hang up and dial 911. If not, call back after I have some awareness of life.

NOT closing on the house today

After all that to get those documents notarized and overnighted, it turns out there are things you have to do the day before and couldn't get done because of the holiday weekend.

I'm a bit short on time right now, so I'll just post a picture of our living room/family room furniture set (belongs to the "redneck" collection by Ashley Furniture)

I'm going to be the poster child for AAA

Can you believe it?
AGAIN we had to call them!!!

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!

Today we had to get the documents notarized for the sale of our house and overnight them to the lawyers. Of course tomorrow's a holiday and the following day is Saturday... The closing is actually Monday. HOWEVER... overnight does not mean overnight. It means next full business day, so even though today was Thursday and overnight from today was Friday and overnight form Friday was Saturday and overnight from Saturday is Sunday.. we still had to overnight the documents to get them there by Monday. And The good old USPS system could not, would not guarantee that they'd be there Sat. Maybe Monday. Maybe.

We have different definitions of overnight, apparently. I think I'd like them to watch my kids overnight. (using their definition, of course)

So.. you KNOW things are not going to go smoothly for us, right? We go to our local bank- Navy Federal thinking that "banks notarize stuff for you". And mind you it's the only Navy federal for 30 minutes at 4:00 the evening before a holday weeking- and it was standing room only in the parking lot, much less in the building. Get there, through line and get the 'we only notarize Navy Federal documents by law' line.

HUH?

Well then. We're going to find a bank. We had (or have if we didn't cut them up) a Bank of America credit card, there are Bank of America's here, let's find one.. consult GPS. oh, good, it's .5 miles away, we have a chance to get there and to UPS it overnight before the pickup tonight.

Have you ever run out of gas? At the absolute worst time? yep. That was today.

And.. because it's us.. we have a Diesel and (just FYI) the "worst thing you can do to a diesel is run it out of fuel, you can't just put fuel in and restart it like a gas engine" ( I thought putting GAS into it was the worst thing you can do to it. I guess I was wrong.) But I guess it has something to do with the diesel fuel injectors are not supposed to get dry- they then need to be primed...

now in my defense- the gas light had only come on less than 5 miles before we actually ran out of fuel. I'm not a dummy, I figured basic math means if I have 2 gallons left and the light comes on, I have at least 20 miles to get to a gas station, right?

Uh, no. Not if your gas gauge doesn't function. If your gas gauge doesn't function it's a craps shoot if you're going to go on any given day, period. With Diesel prices as they are and as little driving as I've done since arriving here, I haven't actually filled it to know it wasn't working. I'd put in the $75 worth of Diesel before the pump automatically cuts off and go. heck, that's over 10 gallons, I shouldn't have to worry about running out of gas anytime soon.. but.. $75 doesn't really move the needle on the gas gauge on a 44 gallon tank any more than parking on a hill does.

So... driving that less than .5 miles to bank of america (who btw does NOT notarize anything at the smaller branches) we get the shuttering followed quickly by stalling of the truck, glide into the driveway of a grocery store and there we stall- right smack in the way of everyone pulling in to buy their beer for the holiday.

AAA here we go again. (they're going to add our phone number to their blocked caller list) I'd already done the look up and down the road for a gas station with the green "diesel" sign and our GPS didn't have the gas stations on her that I could actually see, so I wasn't taking her word for it that the closest gas station was 1.9 miles away.

And I have a eureka moment here- the branch you get when you call the 1-800 number is based on the number you are calling from- I call from my VA cell phone and I get VA who transfers me to the "correct area" to help me. I called (when I locked ourselves out) on a CA phone and Voila- I get the right branch the first time- just like magic.

VA lady said "ok, where are you located?" and I give her the address blah blah blah, Oceanside, CA and she says "CALIFORNIA?" yes. "OH you're far from home" oh, yes, yes we are. "you in a safe place?" yes, sorta, we're blocking the driveway to beer before a holiday weekend, but otherwise fine "can you tell me where the driver can find you?" Yes, where you pull into the grocery store- right there-blocking the driveway- there is a massive brown SUV stalled. That would be us.

But since I'm here at my computer, you know the story doesn't end there.

As luck would have it, in the same strip mall as the grocery store was a shipping/public notary store. So.. the bank (in said grocery store) couldn't notarize it, but the notary could.. while I was waiting for AAA guy, Lary went in with kids, got his part notarized, AAA came, I went in with kids got my part notarized, the rest signed and in the UPS envelope for their drop off station in the same building. And no, it was not cheap.

And very lucky for us, the truck started. And.. just in case you decide to run out of fuel in a diesel- THIS is what you're supposed to do- turn on the key part way- like you do for the little coil looking thing to light up. You'll hear the hissing noise of the fuel injectors. turn off and repeat a bunch of times until the hissing you hear is sorta like the hissing you hear when you normally start the truck. It started very very roughly- Larry thought it was running on maybe 4 cylinders.. but 4 cylinders could get us home faster than 4 feet dragging 8 other feet. eventually it ran as it was supposed to.

And a long stop at the gas station later... it now has a full tank of gas. And the gas guage says we have 1/4 of a tank left.